March 16, 2007

Michael DID swallow milk into his lungs and now he has a lung infection. This means he is on another antibiotic now. My poor little baby. The doctor said that him pulling out his tubes is a pain in the butt, but it is also a good sign. He is very active.

We will know in about 7-10 days if the infection will be gone.

I had a hard day today. I found out that not only brain bleeds, but also some kinds of medication could cause cerebral palsy. I was crying all morning in the NICU and told the nurse eventually what my fear was. The doctor told me later that day that they do NOT give medication that could cause cerebral palsy. That was kind of a relief. Also, the nurse said that preemies of this age have a bigger chance to have hearing and visual problems. I think Michael can hear fine. He does react to the loud noices in the NICU. Today was a 'down' day on the emotional roller coaster, but I hope tomorrow will be better.

When I returned to the NICU later this afternoon, I had to wait outside, along with some other mothers. Something was going on. I got a little nervous. What if it was Michael? Then I saw another mother go inside. She was crying and she was the only mother allowed inside. She was the mother of the twins next to Michael. They are both under 2 pounds. I think the baby was stable after about 10 minutes after I got there. It's hard breaking to see someone elses pain like that, because you know what they are going through, and you also feel guilty for being 'happy' that it isn't your child. Terri, the head nurse (and the one that calmed me down this morning) said: 'Mamma Pincus, it wasn't Michael, otherwise I would have called you right away!'. They are all so nice in the NICU!!

I try to breast pump in the NICU now. For some reason the pump I have at home really hurts me. It is not a 'hospital' grade pump, and I think I am starting to feel that now. I have decided that I am going to rent one after all.

This morning, the other nurse Miguel, came to check on my incision and it is almost closed and infection free. This means that Stefani, my 'regular' nurse does not have to come by any more in the morning. It's a shame. I really liked her :) She did a great job!!! I am glad that I am healing though...